My old friend, you've paid me yet another visit.

how long has it been? two years? almost.

and now, your little heart ripping tactic is coming back to haunt me.

it must be fun to see me like this,

distraut, confused and tired.

in fact, you were the cause of my nightmares.

behold, you come like a rat smelling cheese.

as soon as another angel comes to recieve me,

you'll be around the corner, to besiege me.

and now, one beautiful angel has once again descended.

and i SMELL your presence, your wretched stench fills the air all around.

your presence makes me fearful, of my past.

the fear does not consume me.

it merely poses an obstacle to my being.

another hurdle,

another chain,

that prevents me from being,

who i really am.

but of course, not that you will care.

you revel in my dispair

you laugh at my tears,

you spit in my triumphs

and kill off all joy.


OH, where would i be without you, committing the same mistakes.

in a very vague sense, i should be thanking you,

for protecting me all these years.

but please, stay away from me.


now.