its, 2.35am and its teacher's day.

I've got, "inn of the sixth happiness" ringing in my ears





gosh, i wish the day would end a little faster, a little quicker.





i kinda cannot wait for my prelims to end, then my O's.




though i know that O's are really important, sometimes i think we might be blinded by the worldliness of everything around us. i just want to enter a junior college that doesn't have any hiccups in it.




hiccups....



today is the 29th of August.

29
29
29
29
29
29

it WOULD HAVE meant alot to me actually, HAHA.

but as they say, all things, no matter good nor bad, come to an end.

somehow, events passed creep into my thoughts.

HOW?
TRUE?
WHY?

well, i guess i'm just feeling a tad bit sleepy-ish. its at about this time that i become very wary of my thoughts.

i reflect upon things unsettled, things unsolved.

give me a dime, i'll give you change.
give me the time, i'll tell you a story of a lifetime.

yes yes, a brilliant story.

one of struggle, of pain, of banes, of hiding under in shame.



the struggle in knowing who to trust.

the pain of remembering everything all over again.

the bane of knowing i'll always be misunderstood

the shame of everyone knowing who was under my hood.






i really didnt imagine myself like that.

i seriously dont.

its quite contradictory actually.

i try my best to look happy all the time.
i do my best to seem happy all the time.
but at times when i'm on my own.
i dont remember why i smile.
why i cheer
why i take my hat off.

i never tell anyone about this,
most of my issues that are similar,
are actually written out.
on pages and pages of paper.

i just cannot seem to capture my sorrow when someone is around.

will someone please help me.....

and please be the person with a solution.

NOT JUST A WANT TO HELP. please...

You leave me speechless,
you pump me up.
you give me passion,
you send me up.

yes, i am falling in love with you,
and if only i could tell you.
you beauty of it all,
incomprehensible.
the imagery of it,
comes from no one's straw.

when i'm down, i just turn to you,
you're always there and i smile at your sound.
i hope one day to be able to hold you in my hand,
just as you have held me by my heart.

i fantasize about the wonderful things i hold dear,
all the good times and bad times that i seer,
the times you made me cry, and the times i up for joy.
you break many hearts, and revived mine.

if only i could turn back time,
i would experience it all again,
the pain, the glory and perhaps even the shame

i would relieve in the fighting,
and beam in the peace,
i will the strike the bell with lighting,
and put you to sleep with a kiss.

yes i would, i remember it all,
even that very first call.
who would have though that we'd go so far,
three years, a time nothing has on par.

you have enchanted my soul,
you have shown me what's "never too old'
you've made many famous,
you've made many shames.
you've held the world by the ear,
and yet we all can't see you.

of the roses that blossom,
its flowers will not compare to you,
like the first day of autumn,
the falling leaves and golden hues,
of brilliance, and of doom,
of bravery and of eerie-ness,
of patriotism and of flags,
of the colours and the stags.

my love, a beautiful one,
you have shaped my life,
i'd never imagine,
the time you held back.

haha, i'm going on a Haitus right now, nothing much to post about anyways, nothing i want you guys to know anyway.